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Why dogs don't come when called

a Havanese theory by Rags

People are strange. They so often complain about the age old problem of their dogs not coming when called. Dog owners have been grumbling about this for centuries, and all along the answer has been there, right in front of them. As we dogs all know, this is a problem created by the humans themselves. The answer is so simple. I don't know why no one has ever explained it before. Perhaps it only needed a smart little Havanese like me to bring it all to light. I have been studying this for a long time and done careful research both at home and a school and now I am finally ready to publish my theory.

Have you ever noticed how incredibly difficult it is for humans to choose a single good name for their pooches? The first thing that people do with a brand new adorable puppy is to saddle it with some great big long fancy name that they never intend to use again, except maybe occasionally on paper; something like Twilights Ragamuffin Prince of Starlight Twinkles ( name has been changed to protect innocent little me. They call this NAME #1 the registered name. Of course, that name is way too long for everyday use, so the next step is to select NAME #2; a short cute call name like "Rags"; you know, the name that they plan on using all the time. Ha!Ha!Ha! I can say from experience that this simply doesn't happen. People just can't stick to one name even when they picked it out themselves.

Next comes the really confusing part. Every time we do something cute or adorable, they give us a new nickname. For instance, when I was just a tiny puppy, I fell into a puddle ( completely by accident I might add). Suddenly I had the brand new nickname "Puddle Paws". Now I had 3 names and it didn't stop there! The list of nicknames just grew and grew to 4,5,6,7,.....Here are a few more from my own personal name collection. Sweetums, Cuddlykins, Sweetpea, Little One, Peanut, FurBall, Munchkin, Snookums, Rascal, Ratnik, Snagglepuss and Raggles. Oh and Smurf is another one... I may be little but I am definitely not blue! The next two are absolutely, positively awful; FurFace and FuzzButt. Oh! The shame of it. To round out the list I have a smattering of Spanish names in recognition of my heritage.. Remolino is a whirlwind, Chiquito is a little boy and, Encantador is a charmer. There are many more but you get the picture.

With so many names, how can a poor little puppy be expected to keep them all straight? And come when called? It takes a while to sort through the list to see if the name being called is one of mine or not. It is a testament to the fabulous, forgiving, flexible canine nature that we of the dog kingdom can tolerate and even come to enjoy this bizarre human quirk without developing multiple split personalities. And, that is why dogs don't always come when called ... we have too many names! Oooops, gotta go, someone in the kitchen is calling for Snickerdoodles
... that could be me ... and that could mean snacktime!